ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
