When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
