I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
