You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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