It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize