I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Randomize
