And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
