the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
