I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
