too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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