it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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