I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
