i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
