I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize