Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
