I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I need water and some morals
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
