i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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