try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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