I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I still have a little drunk in my system
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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