he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
