is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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