walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize