Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Come see our sink grown plant.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
