Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
