i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
