BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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