just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
