whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
