He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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