But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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