I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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