I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
pray to the hookup gods
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
