Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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