He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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