Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
