what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize