I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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