apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
