There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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