He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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