You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Lo siento on account of my penis...
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
