we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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