i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
