NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Randomize
