how can u be prego again
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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