i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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