It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize