Already got asked if we're dating
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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