Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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