Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
