she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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