Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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